Boundaries: Where Necessary

Boundary: a line that marks a limit.

Having real boundaries set, were not a real thing to me until I had a child. There were boundaries that I had subconsciously set, based on my moral compass, and time.  However, having a child made me really think about things that I could no longer allow or participate in, to ensure I was spending my time and energy where it was most important, with my child.

As I begin to grow in motherhood and as an entrepreneur, I began to set more and more boundaries. Boundaries were necessary in order for me to be to be organized, to have peace, and ultimately to be successful.  I was, initially, very reactive in setting boundaries, setting them only after a point of frustration.  Then I realized the benefit of proactively setting them to avoid frustration, confusion, and wasted time.  I also learned that when setting boundaries, I had to eliminate emotional inhibitions.  I couldn’t be concerned with how people would feel (if my heart was in the right place) and I had to focus on what was best for my child and my personal success.

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I almost considered going back to work!

I was ready to go back to work last week.

What the hell? I was ready to go back to work last week.  I called my business partner and told her.  I think I am about to start looking for a job, and I was serious!  Thank God she didn’t really entertain me too much, she just said “I understand”, lol!  My best friend told me, “You need time with your child, just ride the wave.”  The next day,  I was completely fine.  In fact, I’m overwhelmed with work and totally against going back to work now, LOL.

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If I Don’t Kill, We Don’t Eat!

“If I don’t kill, we don’t eat!”

Three years ago, my daughter came into my life! I did not come into hers, and I do not move in a fashion that suggests such, either. I don’t mean that in a mean or aggressive way, more so in a realistic way! I am often asked, how I handle and how I balance.  The answer is, how I always have.  I get it done!  I don’t make excuses for myself, and I definitely don’t use her as an excuse! If I don’t kill, then we don’t eat. So, I do what I have to do, it’s simple. I focus on one thing, getting it done! I have moved this way since she was born, and so, this is second nature for us.

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The Power Trip

“Being powerful means helping someone else find their voice.”

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POWER.  What comes to mind when you think of being in power? Being in control, in charge, strong – flexing your muscle, having it ALL.  That sounds like power, right? Power is having the ability to orchestrate the results you want in a given situation; it is having the wherewithal to delegate and to make decisions that will largely affect others.

WRONG!!! Power is leadership, and how your leadership can impact those led by you! It is using your position and resources to benefit others, in a positive light! Power is using your leadership to inspire and create more leaders. “Lifting as we Climb”, a mantra coined by the National Association of Black Accountants, is what having power is all about.

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Fail Early – Fail Often – Fail Upward

“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” – Henry Ford

Failure, defined as a lack of success, and the omission of expected or required action.  It is mentioned with negative connotations and associations of shame.  I challenge you today to replace point of view, and magnify all failure as data points – data points for what will not work, measurements for improving, and understanding your resilience.

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