Late last year, I began my love affair with therapy! Quite literally, one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my life. My decision to go was very impromptu and impulsive, but this is the one time that I was truly appreciative of my impulsive nature. I did not go because I was suicidal, depressed, or mentally ill! I went because I wanted to dump…Dump a ton of SHIT, on someone who won’t judge me and that is paid to LISTEN to understand, and not reply.
So the back story is, I lived in Chicago for a stint, and while living there, I feel like all of my girl-friends went to therapy. I never really gave it much attention, it was more like an “O, that must be the thing to do here.” So, as I tell you guys in every single post, I quit my job last year in March, and became a full-time entrepreneur. I remember there was a month, that was just a struggle (pay your small businesses on time) and I was ready to go back to a 9-5 for about 5 hours. The day after, we were good and paid, and the ebbs and flows of being an entrepreneur continued (with the rest of life) and I decided, I wanted a therapist.
If you’re anything like me, when I want something, I simply can not stop thinking about it, until I make it happen. So being an entrepreneur, I wasn’t sure that my health insurance covered therapy. I called and, it did! I immediately began my search for an African-American, female therapist, because….well, HELLO!
So I found my therapist, and I remember I had like a two-week window before my first appointment. Those two weeks were brutal because I drove myself crazy thinking about what I wanted to dump firs: work, single-parenthood, dating, new ideas, etc. Turns out I covered it all, in one hour (LOL), and ever since then, I’ve been back every week! I am no longer dumping, but I am just having general life conversations with my therapist.
Let me explain to you how much I love therapy (*cues Tony Braxton “Count the Ways”):
- My therapist is SIGNIFICANTLY older that me! Old enough to be my grandparent! No shade. I don’t think she’s a 100% perfect fit for me, because she doesn’t 100% relate to a 34-year-old. HOWEVER, I really appreciate the blunt and unbothered aura that comes with an aging woman. I will at some point look for another therapist, but I have gotten comfortable. So, she’ll probably have to put me out first.
- I don’t have any “real” problems, but therapy feels so healthy for me, that I don’t see myself stopping anytime soon. My therapist recommended that I come once a month, instead of every week, and I was like, “Nahhh, ummm let’s try bi-weekly, first!” I tried bi-weekly and I told her, “Nope, I’ll see you next week…not interested.” It’s my me time, and it literally feels good to just talk through my week. I look forward to therapy, every week! It’s the one time a week, that I put work on pause.
- Therapy really allows me the opportunity to think through and resolve life in a way that just feels good! My therapist does not listen to my scenarios and offer solutions. Instead we talk, and the conversations inspire new ways of thinking and processing behaviors and events, that I encounter daily. In the event, I don’t agree with something, or something doesn’t apply, I leave it right there, in that room.
I talk very candidly about going to therapy, and I encourage my close friends to go, as well. Now, what’s hilarious is, whenever I’ve told a guy that I go to therapy, there’s always a short pause, LMBO, as if they think somethings wrong with me. It’s quite funny! However, I always ignore them, and I really try to normalize it for everyone I encounter! As I navigate through working and engaging, I am shocked to encounter other women who are married, single, and of many stages in life, attending therapy! It’s refreshing to know, that we are taking care of our mental health!
Therapy, has been a game changer for me. It’s really a form of self-care that I don’t intend on stopping anytime soon!